Welcome to the World of The GENIUS! This celebrates the Egg-Head among us and the achievements which are held within their preposterous capacious noodles!
This also goes to prove that anyone can be a genius...if they really put their mind to it........

In 1921 Albert Einstein won the Nobel Prize, and was elected for Fellow of the Society. In 1922, he won the Nobel Prize in Physics, besides other noteable achievements

But we don't really want to know this- we want bad science

Lets face it, using a knife is a real pain. First you actually have to find one, then master the art of spreading the butter across the toast. Phew what a chore. Good job someone thought of a better solution before we forgot how to find our arse with both both hands.


This was actually designed to enable men to be able to breast-feed their children. Well thats alright then. Makes perfect sense, because lets face it, that's what it'll be used for.


What could be worse than going out with Hay Fever or a cold? I mean, what a prat you'd look fetching a clean handkerchief out of your pocket and blowing your nose. And of course no-one takes Anti-Histamines, because thet's just plain stupid- you'd look ridiculous, wouldn't you?


*pinches bridge of nose* What can you possibly say to this? Well it was designed for lazy people who can't be bothered to clean their floor. Just fit the baby-clean 3000 to a small snotty child and allow it to buff and shine all day long. For those who don't have children, you will be pleased to learn this idea has been adapted into a 'shoe' which fits snugly onto your cat. Yes...Cat.


So it's my scientific theory that anyone can create the next big thing- look a pseudo-intellectual-cleaning-ponce James Dyson if further proof were needed.

We already have Hoovers- what the world needs now is.....another Hoover! Genius.

However I think the 21st century can do with new improved Knicker Elastic- most of the 21st century girls seem to be loosing their pants rather too quickly. More money is currently being spent on teenage pregancies, than is spent on Education. Chavs. The new world order stemming from babies they couldn't fit round the U-Bend.

Its all down to knicker elastic- and thats my scientific persective.

One bone of contention (and one I was told off for in a dissertation) asked "what preventative measures can be placed on modulating populations in developing nations?"
I wrote:
Sunny Delight + Hemlock + Aldi = Modified population, England.
Well I thought it was funny in a Final Solution sort of way.